Remember the baby deer? I don't know how, but I seem to have turned into this powerful Beast Magnet. It's like being in a "In Soviet Russia" joke. The animals, they brake for me.
This morning, a big wild turkey tried to shuffle off the mortal coil by placing itself in front of my (moving) car. Watching it run was like watching an extremely pregnant woman participating in a 100-meter race against her wishes. Funny, yes, but ultimately painful.
The bird made it OK. I gave it an angry stare in the rear-view mirror while silently mouthing "Thanksgiving 2009". No coffee was spilled.
Now I wait for the suicidal wildebeests, misanthropic dolphins and sad woolly mammoths.