Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Why Did The Baby Deer Cross The Road?

1. Car rolling down the road, Blind Boys of Alabama blasting.
2. Baby deer very awkwardly leaps into frame.
3. OH SHIT.
4. Furry little cute little awkward-walking baby deer crosses over to the other lane and freezes DIRECTLY in front of the BIGGEST SUV ON EARTH.
5. OH SHIT.
6. BIGGEST SUV slams brakes.
7. OH SHIT.
8. Baby deer shivers, quivers, trembles and cowers.
9. OH SHIT.
10. Meanwhile, in my car: hot coffee has been displaced, magically, from container to crotch. (Externally of course..instead of its usual route from container to mouth and so on southward.)
11. Roasted nuts. Mmmm.
12. Traffic stops, baby deer unfreezes and runs - awkwardness all gone - unhurt over to the other side.
13. Deep breath. Blind Boys of Alabama back on. "Free at last, free at last, thank God Almighty..."

10 comments:

Space Bar said...

you have the biggest SUV on earth?

km said...

Me, no. That was someone else. I am a dirty stinkin' hippie, remember?

Space Bar said...

phew. was worried there for a bit. :-) oh ye of little faith.

T C - bicithe said...

So who's with the SUV, boss-man, please.

blackmamba said...

god. that sounds nasty...but as the wise say, if it doesn't kill you, it only makes you stronger...

Tabula Rasa said...

brilliant. gotta love those suv brakes :-)

km said...

TR: They *do* brake for animals.

BM: Are you asking the baby deer to start reading Nietzsche?

TC - bicithe: Oh I'm totally with the SUV guy on this one. That was some fine reflex action.

Fëanor said...

Aha!

km said...

Feanor: (Wham! - ok, bad joke), you have an insight to share?

Fëanor said...

Sadly, no. I thought I did, and I typed 'Aha!', and then, well, the insight went out of sight.