"...'Is metabolic processes are now 'istory! 'E's off the twig! 'E's kicked the bucket, 'e's shuffled off 'is mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisibile!!"That's what they will be saying - minus the laughter and high-fives, hopefully - when they receive your Final Email. (Link to LifeHacker)
For best comedic results, you should consider attaching massive video files to the message. Also use a "cute" HTML template (dancing skulls, black background with red text) with a Real Player file featuring a "poignant" MIDI interpretation of "Forever young".