Sunday, December 24, 2006

Unsafe And Unhealthy, And Consequently, Happy

"Have a safe, happy and healthy Holidays"

I don't recall anyone ever wishing me a "safe Diwali" or a "healthy Holi". It's just preposterous.

As if the weak-assed word "Holidays" is not bad enough, must I be reminded to enjoy these last 2 weeks of the year "safely, happily and healthily"? Didn't I do that for the rest of the year? (No, not really.) Those three words are like the "cheap, fast, high quality" joke in product design. You can pick two, but not all three at the same time.

Look, there's people serving me good food and alcohol and they've got electric wires running all over a plastic tree. You want me to be safe and healthy? And even if I do manage to keep the binging under control (or find a designated driver), just what can we do about the fine spring-like weather at Christmas this year?

I don't know if the Universe talks to you or not, but it certainly does to me. Right now, it's telling me global warming is here and a million penguins just disappeared, so you better have yourself a very Merry Christmas.

Oh I am sorry, did that sound cruel and heartless?

OK then, let's make a million chickens, turkeys and lambs disappear and have ourselves a very Merry Christmas.

There, much better.


Did you know that to some Hindus, Jesus is an avataar of Vishnu's? I did not know this, until I read this post written by my super-clever (and now famous!) blogger-friend about the origins of Christmas in India.

Must say, that puts the song "Blue Christmas" in a very different light.


kundalini said...

here's 12 days of indian christmas. :)

km said...

That is funny :)

Salil said...

As far as the healthy part of it - does consumption of lots of vino (with a fair bit of red) count? I spent four days of my break in the Tamar Valley and Yarra Valley regions down under. Lots of very good Pinot. That's healthy, innit? :-D